Member-only story
How My Life Changed in a Moment
2013
My father was on the DNR (Do Not Resusitate) list. Lying in the hospital. On his birthday, of all days. We were waiting for the doctor’s assessment.
So many things had to go right for him to get through this. He was 86, so he’d had a good life. Perhaps this was it. Mum had passed at 81 a year before, when we all thought dad would go first.
A few days later things turned for the good. My dad went home and we began to repair a broken relationship.
I decided to leave my job and spend time with him. Not live in each other’s pockets. That would likely have made things worse. But to simply have time for him without the pressure of a job to go to.
It worked. We talked more. Small talk most of the time. Many times he repeated stories over and over. I just nodded, said “uh-huh” a few times and asked him what happened next. And away he went.
I came to know my dad in many different ways. How he and mum had an agreement that he would run the business ans she would look after the house and kids. Neither were very affectionate or overly supportive. A product of their times I guess.
One surprising story was how he and a mate, in the late 1940s, had driven a car from Perth to Newcastle for dad’s mate to “see a bird” (girlfriend). No other…